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Jan Waterman

Late one night, in the dark of her employer’s parking lot, my daughter discovered that her car had been vandalized. Two of her windows had been smashed.

“Mom, don’t tell me I attracted this to myself. I had nothing to do with this. It was a senseless act by another person, so why did it happen?”

“It’s not about knowing why your car was vandalized,” I told her. “It’s about recognizing that everything in our lives happens for us.”

Instead of focusing on why something happens — as if getting an answer will help us accept it — we can choose to see everything as a gift. When we do, our focus shifts from being stuck in the past, where we have no power to change anything, to the present moment, where we do.

At the heart of the law of attraction is the recognition that when we change the way we see things, the things we see change. What if we accepted that everything that happens in our lives happens for our good? What if life is always giving us the best we are willing to accept and receive? How would we view the present moment if we knew that in the end it would turn out perfectly?

When we accept what is, we let go of our thoughts about how things should be and open ourselves to our own power. Past events remain the same, but the way we view them changes. We invite our wisdom and compassion to transform us, rather than the event.

“Okay,” my daughter sighed. “In the case of my broken car windows, I can be grateful that it’s repairable, that dad’s paying for it and that no one got hurt. But Mom, what about rape and genocide? That is more than a couple of broken car windows. The level of atrocity isn’t even in the same ball park!”
“We can’t ever know why things happen as they do,” I told her. We’re not going to get all the answers. It’s not even about getting answers.We can decide what we value, what qualities we want in the world and in ourselves. We can choose to acknowledge that our essence is love.” We see what we expect and we expect what we invite. It’s our perspective that is limited, not us. Can we trust that death is as good as life, that it comes at just the right time? If not, we are taking on the role of God without the awareness of it.

“I don’t get it. Are you saying that death is not bad?” My daughter was incredulous.

“Accepting what has already happened means that we simply don’t argue with reality, an argument we’re never going to win.”

When we accept what is, we choose a higher perspective. We align ourselves with what we do want, not what we don’t want. We believe that life happens for us, not to us. We show up in life as who we really are because we know that whatever happens, we can respond from our truest essence. Everything turns out to be a gift. It’s hard for us to let go of thinking we need to decide what is good and what is bad. When we judge, we trade reality for what is not true. Our judgments prevent us from being who we really are.

“Are you saying that when we change our perception, the world changes?” my daughter asked. “But how does that make a difference in the world?”

As one of more than six billion people on the planet, our choices might seem deceptively small and ineffective. Yet, paradoxically, what seems small is really everything. Our world changes when we change the way we see it. We begin to trust ourselves, others and life itself. We believe in the goodness of life. We invite the best of life to reveal itself. As Gandhi said, “We change the world by being the change we wish to see.”

“Are you saying that if I decide to believe that everything happens for my good, then I will see goodness in life and in others, which leads to more goodness? Kind of like a never-ending cycle?”
“Why not try it and see for yourself?” I challenged her.

Jan Waterman is a writer, teacher and learner who is passionate about life and discovering what is true. She hopes that what she writes will open people to considering new thoughts and ideas about their spiritual selves. waterman@frii.com